I Know You're Out There!
Gooks on the wire!
I see all of your beady little eyes, just at the edge of the firelight. I throw scraps of meat out there, and I hear you slurping them up, but I never see you.
I put those web counter thingys up, there to your left, a few months ago, just as decoration. I saw them on other blogs I frequented, and thought they made the blog look, well, more bloggy.
Then it became a minor obsession of mine, not to count the hits, per se (that just makes me cry, because what if all of you just gave me one damn dollar! 50 cents even! Damn) but to see who was on...where they were from. A goofy hobby, but oh well.
Lately, I see people doing massive amounts of page views, and staying on for an hour or two at a time. It kinda weirds me out.
Am I being investigated for arrest, or a lawsuit? Do I have obsessive fans, who will show up and boil my rabbit?
Oh, don't run away. You know I love you all, and wish you happiness and puppies and smooth bowel movements, but seriously...